(התובנה שבטקסט לקוחה הישר מצ‘ארלס אייזנשטיין, וכתבתי אותו כהכנה לתכנית רדיו של זהר צמח, שבה השתתפתי, אפשר לשמוע כאן, תודה לזהר!)
מאיפה באה ההתמכרות? מההפרדה.
מכורות לשוקולד או מחוברות אליו?
בתרבות שלנו, מוקדם מאוד בהתפתחות שלנו כבני אדם אנחנו מוגדרים כ“אינדיוידואל” ומתבקשים ללמוד “לדאוג לעצמינו“, אנחנו מופרדים מהידיעה שאיתה אנחנו מגיעים לעולם שהכל הוא “אני” שאני מחוברת לכל דבר, וש”הכל” הוא לטובתי, הכל דואג לי. פתאום אני מוגדרת כישות ניפרדת, ואני חווה אובדן: האדמה, בני האדם, החיות והצמחים הם לא אני, הם ישויות נפרדות ויש להם אינטרסים שונים משלי, הם לא כאן בשביל לדאוג לי ואני לא אמורה לדאוג להם, אני אמורה לדאוג רק לעצמי.
התרבות שלנו מלמדת אותנו להיות כוחניים ביחס שלנו לכל מה שניפרד מאיתנו: לנצל לתועלתינו, להשמיד מה שלא מועיל לנו, להאמין שאם לא נשמיד נושמד, ולבסוף, מלמדים אותנו שאם יהיה לנו כסף נוכל לקנות דברים ולהפוך אותם ל“שלי“. זו נחמה מאוד גדולה, אך לא מספקת. הקרע האמיתי שלנו לא מתאחה, וככל שאנחנו מתבגרים, צוברים רכוש, אוכלים ושותים, יוצרים קשרים זוגיים, הצורך שלנו בחיבור לא בא על סיפוקו.
להיות בעלים של משהו, לצרוך משהו, הוא פיצוי שבא למלא את החלל שנוצר כשהופרדנו מסביבתנו. אבל כל עוד אנחנו בתודעת נפרדות, החלל נישאר וכאן ההתמכרות ניכנסת לתמונה.
לא עד שנלמד מחדש לראות שאנחנו חלק ממכלול שלם, ושהמכלול דואג לנו.
במקור, “צריכה” היא פעולה אשר באה לספק צורך אמיתי. כל יצור חי צורך משאבים מסביבתו כדי לשגשג בה. הקרע, הייחודי לבני האדם, מוביל אותנו לצרוך משאבים בלי קשר לצרכים האמתיים שלנו. זוהי ההתמכרות. התמכרות היא צריכה של חומר או רגש שאין לה חיבור לצורך האמיתי. למשל, אנחנו אכן זקוקים למים, אבל אפשר להתמכר ולשתות יותר מדי! אנחנו אכן זקוקים למזון, אבל כמובן שאנחנו מכורים לו כי אנחנו אוכלים בלי קשר לצורך האמתי של הגוף במזון. כולנו מכירים את “הבור שבבטן” זה שאף פעם אי אפשר “לסתום“.
בטבע אין “בעלות” ואין צריכה מופרזת שלא לצורך, כי הטבע לא מופרד מהטבע, וכל יצורי הטבע הם נטולי תודעת ניפרדות. הם חלק ממערכת החיים.
גם בקהילות מסורתיות (לדאק בהודו למשל) ניתן לראות חיבור של האדם לסביבה ולקהילה שהוא חיבור מלא והרמוני, ואכן מקרים של התמכרות והמחלות הנובעות ממנה הם נדירים עד בלתי קיימים.
הנושא הוא רחב, ואנחנו בעץבעיר חוקרים אותו גם בחיי היום יום וגם במפגשי למידה, דרך העיסוק בחיי קהילה, בתזונה, בכסף וב“בעלות“. תוך כדי פיתוח חיי קהילה אנחנו שמים לב לשינוי בתפיסת הבעלות שלנו, הצורך שלנו ב“פרטיות“, “זוגיות“, “בטחון כלכלי“, נמצא נתחת לזכוכית המגדלת ואנחנו לומדים את הצרכים הללו ובודקים את הלגיטימיות שלהם ואת הגבולות המדוייקים שלהם.
בכנס עץבעיר לחיבור, שיתקיים בעוד שבועיים, ב-17 בינואר, נתמקד במושג הבעלות דרך 4 פריזמות, ונפתח את הבמה (בית פליציה בלומנטל) למפגשים שיעוררו השראה לשינויים מעשיים.
4 הפריזמות:
המקור של הנפרדות – מתי זה התחיל?
המקום של הנפרדות וגם החיבור – בראש של כל אחד מאיתנו
הבעלות שבזוגיות והשחרור שלה כמפתח לשלום בעולם
הבעלות על בתים והשחרור שלה כמפתח לקיימות
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